Note: this was also tagged "gpoy to all my 50 husbands." (gpoy, for all of those out there like me - who only discovered what that meant through the use of Urban Dictionary and many hours spent on Tumblr, is short for "gratuitous picture of yourself." Honestly, it's kind of a way of saying, "This is TOTALLY how I act! LOL!") There are so many ways I could unpack those six little words, but I can't here - not yet. That will come later
- discovery“who is that sex god and why haven’t i noticed him before”
- research“i have to find out everything about him omg what is his full name what is his birthday do you think he has a wife does he have children does he like jam does he like cats i wonder what photos there are of him is he even real omg”
- obsession“i love him so much omg what you like him too no you can’t have him he’s mine no i must collect everything relevant to him i need it all he’s mine MINE”
- plotting“hello google can i have a recipe for the strongest love potion in the world thank you or can you just give me a list of ways to successfully seduce a man that’d be great”“
- depression“i hate you you’ve ruined my entire life why are you so perfect why don’t you know me why does everything suck omg my life is over and it’s all your fault”
- acceptance “i have accepted that i will never know you but i will continuously love you and i am okay with that”
I love this list. It's like the world is doing my work for me. I don't have to go out there and write up my own ideas of how fangirls act - a fangirl already did it for me.
And what a fine little list it is. Of course, these characteristics are different for every fangirl (my stages of research and depression have been far more muted, I think) but it's the perfect little rudimentary device for me to organize my thoughts out here. In my psychological mind, it's like the five stages of grief - a useful way to determine what's going on, but not set in stone. One will bounce around between stages and, once one celebrity has been relegated to the "acceptance" department, a "discovery" comes along and it starts all over again. The cultural studies part of me is screaming, "Fascinating! Look how a phenomenon, considered illogical by so many, has logical themes! Brilliant!"
The blogger part of me is just very, very grateful that I have finally decided upon an organizational technique. As I have yet to actually clearly express where exactly I'm going with all of this, the stages list at least gives a sort of layout for further expedition. But now it comes the time for me to state
MY THESIS.Which is not set in stone, actually mandated by an academic authority, or even really a thesis yet. Because I'm not yet a senior. And this is just a big idea balloon. But doesn't THESIS sound so much more legit than IDEA BALLOON? Yes, of course it does.
But here's the gist: Fangirls occur (as you might have gathered from previous posts) due to a certain zeitgeist of our time. There is resurgence of Romantic ideals in a very modern world with a very complicated dating climate and a very uncertain idea of what exactly one's "goals in life" should be. There are many, many lonely girls, unhappy with school, unhappy with life, dreaming for a Mr. Darcy or an Edward Cullen or a Bono or what-have-you to come and wake up their lives. This is not exactly a philosophical pursuit. This is not exactly psychological, or historical, or sociological, or anything like that. This is me, trying to make sense of what I see, using the theories I've been taught, and applying my own life experiences to a subculture I think is totally fascinating.
I know I promised that there would be exciting, fun stuff (and I didn't totally lie - the stages list is pretty fun). But one final intro post is necessary to lay this all out (in this rather unclear, haphazard format I've already latched on to) and we'll move on to examples and stuff. Because penultimate actually means second to last. And if you didn't know that, then hey! You just learned something. And you get to hear me blabber on about why all this is happening for one more post. Lucky you.