Tuesday, March 27, 2012

"This Love Will Be Your Downfall"

All right, ladies and gentlemen, here we are, in the final few stages of fangirling. I'm going to cover two at once, perhaps because it's easier to talk about them combined, as I feel they weave together.

4. plotting“hello google can i have a recipe for the strongest love potion in the world thank you or can you just give me a list of ways to successfully seduce a man that’d be great”

Here we are in a realm I only recently have begin to see in the world around me. Things like this appearing on my Tumblr dash:

And this:

Actually, these both kind of bleed over into real person fanfiction. But I digress...

I'd use more blatant examples, but I get the feeling like plotting isn't something widely shared except for this fan-fiction sort of ways. And searching under fandoms like Justin Bieber and Robert Pattinson just returned lots of catty comments about whether Twilight sucks, whether the song "Boyfriends" sucks, and girls yearning to have sex with both of them. Better luck next time.

But plotting is rather clear; it involves plans of some sort to meet said celebrity and/or charm/seduce them. It can stay only in the daydreaming state or it can be put into action. Let's just say that stalkers are, in some ways, people in the plotting stage who have gone too far.

Plotting that doesn't work out, or is just left to germinate over and over again, day after day in the mind can lead to frustration and angst and anger, which can lead to...

5. depression“i hate you you’ve ruined my entire life why are you so perfect why don’t you know me why does everything suck omg my life is over and it’s all your fault”

This is NOT the psychological concept of depression, obviously (although, fangirl depression can get pretty intense). No, this is the state of realizing that all the daydreams, all the time you've spent thinking about said someone, all your plotting and scheming (whether fantasized or actualized) has left you with nothing. This generally ends up with lots of rage and tears and upset. And posts like this:

John Mayer... interesting choice for life ruiner. Moving on...

And this:

And this:

Maybe not the most dramatic examples, but you get the idea. I happen to really dislike the term "life ruiner" for many, many reasons. But I will discuss them later, as I've too much to say on the topic and this post is bloody long enough.

And all of this (hopefully) will resolve out in the sixth stage (we'll see about that in another post). For now, here is some hedgehog weirdness for your viewing pleasure:

Okay... this actually just weirds me out. The anthropomorphism has gone too far; this actually kind of creepy. However, my blog needs this weirdness to live. Ah, the double-edged sword that is culture...

But no, seriously. This pic totally bothers me. Which is exactly why it's going on the home page...

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