Tuesday, July 8, 2014

#NotDead

Considering I haven't posted in what feels like a very, very long time, I feel it necessary to open with this:

http://shockingblankets.tumblr.com/post/59537368952/masterpost-updated-here-x-and-here-with

While I can explain my absence, it doesn't excuse it and I apologize for the lot of nothing I've been posting. But this summer has been epically busy for me - and very, very good so far - and I have a bit of catching up to do on my personal posting of things in order to move on to whatever this strange little internet entity is striving to be.

First, work. I'm still working at Target, despite the fact that earlier in the spring I wanted this not to be the case. However, my work at Target has changed greatly since then. For one, the focus of the store feels different that it did during whatever strange transition we were going through post-Christmas and pre-summer, and it's a far more enjoyable place to be. Also, I've been promoted to price accuracy (at least I think it's the full promotion - regardless, I'm doing price accuracy work and it's fabulous). Price accuracy, or price change, entails coming in at six in the morning (the only drawback) to scan through select items, pulling out what's going on clearance, changing price tags, and salvaging items that can no longer be sold but can be donated. It's rather fun, as I work with the same group of people each day, have a less solitary tasks, am learning facets of the backroom, and feel generally like I'm doing better, more precise work. I've pulled an utter 180 about my job, rather enjoying it and actually looking forward to coming in each day. And to those companies I applied to when I was looking for other work (all of whom never even gave me a rejection notice), I can only shrug and say, "Their loss." Because I feel really at home at Target and really appreciated. And it's fabulous. (But more on that in another post; I feel I need to write another "working in retail" post because I rather enjoy those and I can't seem to shut up about my job).

Secondly, writing. In some epic twist of fate and blindly searching through Craigslist for freelance writing gigs, I actually managed to land one. I've just started contributing to Apartments.com, writing about Minneapolis, and I'm so excited about it I can hardly believe it's real. Not only am I being paid to write blog posts on whatever topics interest me, I'm writing about one of my favorite places in the world.

Thirdly, dramaturgy. Somehow, it's happening. I'm dramaturging. This summer, I've interning with History Theatre and providing research for the play guides of three productions they're doing this fall. And I'm going to be doing an observership with Theatre Pro Rata with fall on their production of 1984. I'm uncontrollably excited about both companies and feel incredibly lucky.

Which is generally how I've felt all summer. Expecting this to be a gloomy, stressful season, this has actually been an exciting, busy, wonderful time so far. Not to mention we've been having some glorious weather (in between the monsoon rains we've been getting!) and I'm writing this from the wonderful vantage of the porch at my apartment (perfect Minnesota weather - warm enough for shorts, cool enough for a sweater. I love it). In part, my lack of writing has been greatly due to my exhaustion at the end of the day when I get off work, but also because I'm afraid of sounding too gloating or boastful. I've been amazingly fortunate considering my plans changed greatly since the spring and now, finding I'm happier than I've been in a long time, I also find myself struggling to keep from letting my privilege and overwhelming joy sound pretentious and bragging. Though this isn't what I'd planned, I realized the other day (while getting my hair cut, of all times) that I'm living a dream. So many people dream of moving to a big city and having an apartment and doing what they love and, somehow, I've suddenly ended up doing just that. It's incredibly humbling to have realized that. It may not entirely be how I pictured it, but I'm doing it, and it's all the more beautiful because I didn't see it this way, I didn't have the stale images dreamed over again and again in my mind come true. It's all new and it's kind of scary, but it's also marvelous.

The view from the porch. Now I'm definitely gloating.

That's where I'm at. I can't promise you that my post is going to stick to the same consistency it once did with work and everything the way it is. I've also found that my content may be shifting in a new direction - I've hardly been on Tumblr at all in the past few weeks and other than missing the updates from the people out there, I don't actually miss much of the site. It's nice to get away from the celebrity gossip and the fandom bickering and really sit back and remember what it is about certain media that I really like, what's complicated about them, and how it feels to get away from the acidic, spiteful negativity I too often see online. I might be doing some changes here to the content, appearance, and general being that is this blog, but fear not - it won't be major overhalls. I'm not changing anything major - only finding a way to keep talking about fandom without using the same drawing source (I'm not getting rid of my Tumblr, mind you - I'm just using it far less.) There's a lot I want to write about and now, it's just finding the time and energy to do it. Despite my fatigue and work load, I have loads of energy and feel a motivation I haven't felt since last winter. So, with your patience and indulgence, more posts will be coming. I just don't know quite when (especially as I'm visiting my family in Indiana next week and will have limited internet access).

So, dear readers, I'm happy to say all is well. I'll be back soon with more of my ramblings :D